Lame Jokes of the Liu Liu Gang

*from yesterday's meet up with the liu liu gang*

This one I heard before:

One fine day, the bee family, papa bee, mama bee, and junior bee went for a drive around the country side. Along the way, they saw a grasshopper hitching a hike. So papa bee being a kind chap stopped by to pick up the grasshopper before the continue the journey. After a while, the grasshopper noticed that the car's fuel line is nearing to E, so papa bee stopped over the roadside. Then papa bee proceed to go over to the petrol intake and piss in it. The grasshopper watch in surprise as papa bee starts back the car and the car actually is able to move!
So the bunch continued their journey, and soon enough, the fuel is nearly empty once more. This time, mama bee piss into the fuel tank and the car gets running again. Because the country road is really long and winding, after some while, the car again runs low on fuel. This time, of course, it's junior bee's turn to piss into the tank. And surely enough, the car gets going once more. The grasshopper is so excited at this finding and waits in anticipation for the next fuel up so that he can contribute his piss too.
After some while, as expected, the car runs low on fuel once more. So the grasshopper excitedly volunteers himself. But the bee family shakes their head and said no. The grasshopper is puzzled and asks why. Papa bee explains, "because your pee is not bee pee (BP, short for British Petroleum)".

Another one (this needs some illustration actually to be more funny):

An old man having Alzheimer was being warded into the recuperation facility. But it was so boring for him that he seeks the doctor and ask the doctor to discharge him. The doctor said, "You are not supposed to be discharged because your situation is quite serious". But the old man is quite persistent and the doctor has no choice. So the doctor have a thought about it and told the old man, "Well ok, if you really wants to get out of here, you'll have to show me that you can do this..." And the doctor holds up both his hands with index finger pointing at each other. Then from a distant position, he brings them together and makes both fingers meet.
The old man tried, but he missed. But he was determined to get out of the place, so he practised hard everyday. When he wakes up, before meals, after meals, in the shower, before sleep, he will be practising.
Finally after some time, he really got a hang of it and managed to make the 2 fingers meet. He quickly went to see the doctor and showed it to him. The doctor have no choice and said, "Very well, I will write a letter of approval for you to be discharged." The old man was so happy and started clapping his hands, but he's unable to make his palms meet. So he did not get the approval letter in the end.

Another 2 action based lame joke:

If a grasping hand = power, what is -> a hand pulling the grasping hand?
Solar power... because 手拉-power

If there's a bean on a palm, what is -> a hand pressing on the other hand with the bean?
Soya bean... because 手压-bean

HAHAHAHAHAHA...

Lame or not? :P



*UPDATED*

Suddenly remembered one more:

A hand with open palm doing a left and right swaying motion moving forward
= fish,
A fisted hand doing a similar motion as above = fishball

HAHAHAHAHAHA......